Robert M. Galatzer-Levy 49/4 FINDING OUR WAY IN PERPLEXITY: THE MEANINGS OF SEX IN THE ANALYSIS OF A GAY MAN As preconceptions about the meaning of sexual orientation are increas- ingly abandoned, analysts are left with the question of how these matters are to be addressed in clinical work. These problems are explored as they emerged in analytic work between a “gay” man and a “straight” analyst. Emphasis is placed on how the search for personal meaning is impacted by the intellectual and social context inhabited by analyst and patient. T his is a paper about my perplexity as an analyst. In our times ideas about gender and sexuality have changed rapidly. Many of these changes are welcome—they reflect a fuller, more humane, and more accurate vision of the significance of sex and gender in people’s lives. However, these changes make it harder for thoughtful people, including psychoanalysts, to f ind convincing perspectives from which to understand sexuality. Working day to day, analysts hear countless stories of sexual thoughts, feelings, and actions. Some of us believe we have a clear framework within which to understand these stories. Others of us, though, including myself, f ind ourselves without clear guides to under- standing. We know that conscious and unconscious attitudes inevitably shape how we understand and work with patients, but how these factors affect our work is often obscure. Analysts commonly work toward implicit goals, which have changed with the times but which, precisely because they have not been thought through, profoundly affect the analytic work (Sandler and Dreher 1996). In this paper I explore how I listened to a man whose sexual wishes were not always easy to understand empathically. I examine how our Training, Supervising, and Child and Adolescent Supervising Analyst, Chicago Institute for Psychoanalysis; Lecturer in Psychiatry, University of Chicago. Submitted for publication June 14, 1998. ja p a