14 DISSENT · FALL 2019 Lifestyle Migrants Sheila Croucher I attended a weekend seminar in April, “Fast Track Your Retirement Overseas, 2019,” hosted by International Living (IL), a magazine that for the last forty years has sold the idea of better living abroad. Clutching a “welcome pack” tote bag, I joined an eager cadre making its way into the exhibit hall of an Orlando hotel. In exchange for approximately $1,000, con- ference organizers had promised not only to “reinforce [our] dream” of retir- ing abroad, but also to explain “how to make it happen.” We would learn to navi- gate cross-border legal status, tax laws, property transactions, banking, invest- ment, and cultural attitudes, while acquir- ing strategies for maximizing profits and avoiding frustrations. We would also enjoy the company of “like-minded people.” Beyond a shared interest in moving outside the United States, the meaning of “like- minded” remained unclear. Tables lining the hall were staffed by an amalgam of IL correspondents, real-estate agents, attorneys, and financial advisers. A colorful Panama table beckoned us to “Come for the Lifestyle . . . Stay for the Value.” Another large placard announced: “55% Off Southern Spain.” In addition to promoting enticing prices for homes featuring lush vistas, a Costa Rica table boasted of low-cost cosmetic dentistry. Financial advisers peddled special “expat” tips for accessing Social Security and Medicare, and two diamond companies were on hand to tout the advantages of mineral investments: stability, portability, anonymity, and worldwide convertibility. For the spiritually minded, a life-coaching company proffered assistance with “per- sonal growth and transformation” as conference-goers prepared for a “Hero’s Journey” of moving abroad. While our band of 350 overwhelm- ingly white, fifty-five-plus, middle-class Americans learned of opportunities in other countries to achieve our dreams, Central American migrants were facing a nightmare. Fleeing gang violence, political corruption, and extreme poverty, record numbers are risking a treacherous journey northward to the United States. Upon arrival, they are detained in prison-like facilities, or find shelter under bridges or in tents. U.S. border patrol has separated thousands of children from their parents and placed them in chain-link enclosures without proper sanitation. Since January 2017, dozens of detainees have died in U.S. custody, and the U.S. government acknowl- edges that it could take years to reunite immigrant children with their families. While the U.S. government was ken- neling children, IL’s correspondents prom- ised prospective U.S. migrants that their family pets would be afforded easy and safe passage. IL’s Mexico consultant and real-estate attorney, Ernesto Arrañaga, emphasized his country’s friendly and flex- ible attitude toward foreigners, and his col- league, long-time IL correspondent Jason Holland, emphasized that it is “quite easy” to cross the border into Mexico. We were assured that once there Applebee’s and Netflix can still be enjoyed, and that Eng- lish is widely understood and never belit- tled. Neither conference presenters nor attendees appeared unsettled by the fact that while we considered the preeminent spots for U.S. settlement, Trump forged ahead with plans to build a “big, beautiful wall” along the southern U.S. border. No one at the conference ever uttered the word “immigrant.” “We” are “expats.” These jarring realities went unacknowl- edged in other international contexts as well. The previously war-torn country of Colombia, for example, was touted in our handbook as an “up and coming expat haven” and “no longer Latin America’s best-kept secret.” Colombia is also a des- tination for throngs of desperate Ven- ezuelan refugees fleeing their country’s deepening economic and social crisis. More than 1.2 million Venezuelan migrants now reside in Colombia in tent cities or on the streets. Although the Colombian government initially offered the refu- gees assistance, human rights agencies now report a lack of vital resources and mounting xenophobic outbursts, some- times violent, directed at Venezuelans. Presenters also praised Southeast Asia’s “low costs, excellent, affordable health care, and beautiful beaches.”