https://doi.org/10.1177/1321103X18773114 Research Studies in Music Education 1–17 © The Author(s) 2018 Reprints and permissions: sagepub.co.uk/journalsPermissions.nav DOI: 10.1177/1321103X18773114 journals.sagepub.com/home/rsm The roller coaster ride: Our music teacher educator identity development Julie Derges Kastner University of Houston, USA Jill Reese State University of New York at Fredonia, USA Kristen Pellegrino University of Texas at San Antonio, USA Heather A. Russell Cleveland State University, USA Abstract In transitioning from the K–12 classroom to higher education, teacher educators often experience tensions and challenges, which may be due to a misalignment between their situational and substantial selves. While many researchers have explored identity transitions of teacher educators, more research is needed to understand this experience with music teacher educators. Using self-study, we explored our identities as four music teacher educators, plus one additional participant, in transitioning from being music teachers to early- career music teacher educators. Data included interviews and personal journals, and we developed restoried narratives, non-linear representations, and cartoons during data analysis. These revealed three themes: misalignment, adaptation and acceptance, and roller coaster of growth. Misalignment describes the disconnect we experienced between our substantial and situational selves as a result of three factors: balance, autonomy, and identity. Adaptation and acceptance describes the strategies we developed to respond to the factors leading to our misalignment and accept our developing identities as music teacher educators. Roller coaster of growth describes the indirect nature of the process we experienced as we shifted between misalignment and acceptance. Based on these findings, we suggest further research in the identities of teacher educators throughout their careers and recommend strategies for professional development and support. Keywords identity development, music teacher education, music teacher educator, self-study research, teacher education Corresponding author: Julie Derges Kastner, University of Houston, 130 School of Music Building, Houston, TX 77204, USA. Email: jdkastner@uh.edu 773114RSM 0 0 10.1177/1321103X18773114Research Studies in Music EducationKastner et al. research-article 2018 Article